Things have been going well at home. Our helper is settling in well, although there are some teething issues and adjustment in both me and my Mum's daily routines, I have been feeling really good about the way things are for a while now.
I guess when something like this happens in your family, your perspective of everything around you shifts. At least for me, it did.
I realised that a lot of the negative things that I used to fixate on, just cease to matter altogether. All I want is for my love ones to be happy and healthy. Which may seem like something fundamentally simple, but is ultimately something you may hope but impossible to demand for.
Such is life, I guess. You can spend many years of your life preparing yourself for it, but when it hits you, it hits hard.
To be honest, old age and the ailments that comes along with it really scares me. Although I have never really been the kind of person who displays a lot of emotions towards such circumstances, and I have experienced my fair share in my 30-odd years.
My maternal grandfather suffered from brain and spinal damage even before I was born. All my memories of him were of this child-like old man, who could not even convey properly that all he wanted was a piece of biscuit. His wife, my dearest grandmother, who practically raised me as child, suffered from dementia when I was in my early teens. It was really sad to see her mind go away bit by bit, to the point where she did not even have the basic capacity to dress or relieve herself.
And now, with my Dad's minor stroke, and my Mum who has been having problems walking for a while now, well, I just don't know what to expect when one day, my own old age rolls around.
But I guess there is really no point in fretting about the future. One may prepare for it, anticipate it. But you can never second-guess or reject whatever is in store for you. It is not a bad thing. Everyone goes through the same thing in life, and I am sure there are plenty of happy and healthy people who are enjoying their silver years as well.
Hope's the hope!