Wednesday, July 25, 2012


Let me not to the marriage of true minds 
Admit impediments. Love is not love 
Which alters when it alteration finds, 
Or bends with the remover to remove: 
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark 
That looks on tempests and is never shaken; 
It is the star to every wandering bark, 
Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken 
Love’s not Time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks 
Within his bending sickle’s compass come: 
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, 
But bears it out even to the edge of doom. 
   If this be error and upon me proved, 
   I never writ, nor no man ever loved. 

I Am Proud To Be His Fan

Tuesday, July 24, 2012


How do troubled people deal with whatever is going in their minds, and carry on in their daily lives?

Sometimes it feels like even the simplest of things is unbearable.

Do they actually feel like they are suffering over their troubles? Or perhaps no one can really understand how they feel, because individual pain will never be the same?

Do they also feel like there are different people in their heads, and it is getting more and more crowded?

Something's got to give.

The pounding is getting louder.

I can take it.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Hardy @ DKR

Haha! Look at how happy he was after Gary Oldman allegedly tickled him. I said allegedly because I couldn't see what he did, I like to think he did more than just tickling. ;)

Always a joyous thing when your favourite actor plays around a little with you. And we all know how much Hardy loves his good ol' Sir Gary!


Not speaking to she-who-gave-me-life right now. I think she is being a bitch. But she probably thinks I am being one too.

I think she is not understanding and she probably thinks I am not helpful or whatever shit. I just hate it when she doesn't get it.

She should know by now, after so many years of being my mother, and the past 7 or 8 odd years of living together, that I have my cloudy moments when I just needed to be left alone. I can't even begin to explain why I am so moody and sullen, but this is the way I am, part of the ball-and-chain of being me.

And there she is yakking away, wanting me to do this, do that. None of which are stuffs that are of any particular importance, just things she hate seeing not done. But I've already told her so many times, I have my own timing and pace at doing things. Then she started questioning my efficiency and my capabilities at work? What the hell? Are we in a military camp? Fark! She seriously needs to get off my case man. I am quite sure she was an army general in her previous life, and probably a tyrant in her previous previous life.

Love the woman, but not loving her personality a whole lot right now.

Cloudy, so very, very cloudy.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

May Their Loved Ones Find Peace Eventually.

Establishing some lifelines around me to help keep my sense of balance. Makes me feel better that I am doing something. Gives me a sense of control over the unease and troubles I am feeling.

Felt appalled and sad after reading the news about the Colorado shootings. Not only did it happened during a movie, something that has always been close to my heart, it happened at a movie franchise that I loved and starred a few of my favourite actors, some of whom had been a source of inspiration and solace to me for a really long time.

It felt really personal.

I feel angry at the thought that the sweat, tears and heart poured in by every single person who worked on the movie is forever scarred by the actions of a deluded mad man.

Yet, I feel so much pity for the young men who felt that reality was so painful and so unbearable, that he had to allow himself to slip into something else, destroying other people's lives in the process, in order for him to continue this false sense of existence, of being alive.

"It is a painful thing we have here, this life that we have that we can't seem to understand. That we can never seem to control. But it is our life to live and no one else's. Only we get to decide the consequences our actions will bring." - Hensen Moer

Thursday, July 19, 2012


Dark Knight Rises completed.

I thought I attained nirvana when Batman and Bane started fighting. IF you know what I mean.

How can Hardy be so hot even without his face showing. That is some good eye acting there!

And Christian Bale. What more can I say. He makes me all kinds of aaaaaaahhhhhhhh.

I hate Anne Hathaway a little now.



I still so moody today. What the hell is wrong with me???

It is so frustrating that I am moody, and I don't know how to fix it.

Feel like grabbing and shaking myself angrily, just to make this shitty feeling go away.

Hey you! What's wrong?! WHAT'S FUCKING WRONG?!


Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Batman!!! *deng deng deng deng*

Bale and Hardy!

Looking uber cool here. I am so glad Hardy finally did something about those facial hair. It was getting really scary there for a while. Now he looks like Eames again!

Also spotted two other sharp looking guys!

It's like a Inception reunion here!

It occurs to me just that JGL will always be Ten Things I Hate About You to me. He hasn't changed one bit. Still look like that teenage boy with the shy smile, who is trying to get with the object of his affections, albeit with unorthodox but hilarious methods.

Alright! I will be seeing you boys tomorrow! Except Cillian Murphy. I guess I will see him when I see him. Haha!

Attention Seeking Or Cry For Help?

I have absolutely no idea what is wrong with me. I feel frustrated, moody, and this sort-of-but-not-really anger seething underneath somewhere.

And the irony is things are actually going pretty well, I guess. There is actually nothing that I can really nitpick or complain about.

I have this weird thought that this is just my brains's psychopathic way of making me feel something because I am just so damn bored right now.

Why do I feel this way? Again, I have no clue.

I am going out with friends, I have a spanking new mean machine which allows me to play games AND watch movies at the same time, even have music playing at the same time if I am that sick. And I have been reading quite a bit and planning my US trip. Seems like I should have no room to feel bored at all.

But I just do.

I wish I understand myself a little better at times.

Sometimes I feel like I am this together person who is satisfied and happy with the way her life is going, and other times I just feel like a fucked up, self-loathing loser, shitting her life and her dreams away.

This is messed up. Bets in, how long before I suffer a breakdown and start stabbing people. I will give you really good odds!

Hypothetically speaking, just hypothetically, if I am really so inclined, IF I am to go on a serial killing spree, I think I would be the kind who goes about looking for women who looks like me and annihilating them. I don't know. I like myself pretty much, but I hate being me too.

Go figure.

Is it time for me to start seeing a shrink yet?

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Let's Worship Chaos

I am so bored.

Time for a new obsession.

Everything seems a little too peaceful. A little too neat. I know I shouldn't wish for things to be different because well, wishes have a way of backfiring on you. But sometimes, it is just impossible to help it.

Routines can be so incredibly, mind-numbingly dull.

But then, what's new?

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

The Grand Before 29+1 Trip!

For someone who loves to travel, I don't really post as much as I like about my travels. Because it can get difficult for me to do so.

I am not really the kind who immediately whips out a camera to document every single moment during a trip, although I can get very trigger-happy in surroundings that I find breathtaking or unique.I prefer to soak in everything with my senses, and try to imprint the wonderful moments in my mind. And once I am home, I become lazy to try to organise my thoughts and memories in order enough to put them into words,

But I do so love to travel. And in 2012, I am planning to make a visit back to the States, a country from which many of the stuffs that has tremendous influence and inspiration for me originated from. I will be revisiting LA, Las Vegas, and hitting new places in California like San Jose and San Francisco.

Needless to say, I am really excited about this trip. It is the final trip of my 20s before I officially become old and dingy with the best company who I know will enjoy the States as much I do,so it is definitely going to be a memorable trip. Short of sharing my entire itinerary and risk getting kidnapped by a deranged stalker while I am there (thank you Criminal Minds for making me just bit too paranoid for my own good), there are a few places that I am excited about visiting.

Universal Studios! Had to give this a miss the last time round because we chose Disneyland instead. And after visiting the one here at home in Singapore and having a good time, I definitely want to visit the "original version".

Grand Canyon is the only place in this post that I have been to, and have no hesitations about revisiting again. In fact, I was the one who suggested to go. The last time I was there, I was so awestruck. It was the first time I visited a place I have only previously seen in photos and movies, and considered to be a world wonder. To be there witnessing the sheer magnificence of the canyon is simply indescribable. The calm and quiet just washes over you like it will never end. For a city girl like me, it was an exquisite experience. They don't call it grand for nothing.

Sausalito. Isn't this like a little slice of heaven? Like a scene straight out of a movie. Highly recommended by friends who had been before. Can't wait to take a leisurely stroll and chill with a cuppa there on a lovely afternoon.

So I will admit that I want to visit Alcatraz mostly because of the hype. But there is definitely a certain draw this place has. It is in the middle of the sea and carries such a rich history behind it. Don't think anyone can say they have visited San Francisco if they haven't done Alcatraz.

I know, I know. What is a non-drinker doing wanting to go to Napa Valley? Well, just because I don't drink wine does not mean I don't like grapes. Grapes are pretty cool. =D This is the only place where I specifically requested to go. I really want to have a bed & breakfast out in the nature, with trees, hills as far as the eyes can see kinda experience, and Napa seems like a really lovely place to have it. And we have decided on a charming little B&B!

Well, that's all we have for now. It is still months away, but just thinking about it puts me in such high spirits. Hopefully, I will not get too lazy to post about the trip when the time comes.

Thursday, July 05, 2012

Break Point...?

How do I even begin?

So many things to say, no inclination to speak out. I doubt it will make a difference. Not anymore. We all have to move on at some point, don't we?

Maybe I am too pessimistic, maybe I just did not have the faith. Maybe a breath of fresh air is probably good. Am I too petty? Too stubborn? Again maybe. So many maybes. But these are feelings of anger, of disappointment, of hurt. And they are there because someone has done something to invoke these feelings. They don't just appear out of no where. You cannot just pretend it is not there, and hope that things will be back to normal eventually, because it never works. Eventually something always breaks.

How many times can a person internalise all these negative feelings, sweep her own feelings underneath, until she feels completely depleted?

No one likes feeling like she is conditional upon a big picture.

Seems like the very people who brought out the best in me, made me a better person for everyone else but them.