I am not a dollar-generating high flyer.
I can't drive a car worth a damn.
I don't run marathons.
I am not a talented musician.
I can't charm the socks off everyone I meet.
I don't change lives.

But I am doing my best to fulfill all the things I want and hope to do.

And that, in my very humble opinion, is pretty damn awesome.

:)

Because the world is not solely up to me and my whims.

But I am allowed to think about you.

And I do.

I really do miss you.

Pop

Recently, I find myself feeling the distance with friends that I have known for a long time and really care about, and at the same time, feeling closer with some new friends and friends I have known for a lesser period of time.

Am I changing? Or rather, are my requirements in friends changing that I don't feel as much connection with some, but others?

I am not sure.

I would really like to put in more effort for these friends. I do care about them. People who knows me know that there is nothing I value more than loyalty and friendship.

I have gone through some really memorable experiences with them, both the good and the bad. Am I really the kind of person who can just overlook everything like that?

Is this something that all people who ends up old and friendless go through? I don't think everyone was born to turn into cranky, mean old pricks. Surely, something must have happen along the way?

Maybe this is it?

For some weird reason, this post started out as contemplative but now seems really funny.

Damn.

Oh well.

Because I Do.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. I believe in a grand scheme of things unfolding itself in its own time.

I believe that everything I am going through is part of the journey, not to the end of the story, but to the next chapter.

I believe that if I believe enough, I will find what I really want.

I believe in all of this enough to stop playing games.

Enough to move on.

Anna - Gunnar Madsen

"I guess this is it.

There is just too little to hold on to. Every effort feels like mindless grasping at air.

Why not fight harder, you ask.

I get tired too.

Of the constant disappointments and feelings of dread.

Nothing is ever worth being so unhappy for.

I don't quite understand it either.

I was so good for so long, and it took only a few moments for everything I have worked so hard building to shatter and crumble.

Am I really so weak?

Or was I blinded by a false sense of whatever this was supposed to be.

I deserve more than this.

I know I am better than this."

Dishwalla

"There's nothing in motion and I'm satisfied.
No disappointment till I wake up.
I don't want to wake up."

Just a damn good song, this one.

Really.

Simplicity would be nice.

It's Monday...

...and all questions asked today will be met with this reaction:

Obsess

점점 더 빠져빠져가