The Little Things

My feet are stuck here against the pavement
I wanna break free
I wanna make it
Closer to your eyes
Get your attention
Before you pass me by

Hope

It gets so tiring dealing with all this nonsense after a while.

If certain things in life are out of our control, then why try so hard? Why not just sit back and see if it happens?

What is the point of hoping something happens when it can go so many different directions but never the way you want it to be?

Hope can oftentimes be so incredibly crippling.

"There can be no true despair without hope."

A Short One

The undefined and unspecified morality clauses of society in general can be so restricting at times. People often over-think and subconsciously hold themselves back simply because they believe that certain behaviours are against the basis of decency.

Sometimes these behaviours can be simple things that no body else cares about, but perturbs those in question simply because they feel guilty for even considering whatever it is that is deemed to be against the ideals of the norm.

If there is anything I learnt from years of being a girl, now a woman, is that if you worry about the unnecessary details overly much, you deprive yourself the chance of feeling that excitement of a spark.

The spark can be such a wonderful thing. It makes the world brighter, cheerier, and simply oh-so-marvelous.

That is if you can stop fixating on any possible negating circumstances and just allow yourself to enjoy the moment. Because odds are, if you are gonna sin, you are gonna sin. Nothing will prevent the inevitable from happening.

Avoidance will only make the forbidden even more seductive. Allowing yourself to go through the motions is probably the best way to get to the other side with a clear head, because novelty does wear off after a while. Usually you find yourself wondering what was so great about it in the first place, if there isn't any compelling reason beyond the thrill of something new and unknown.

But is anyone ever that clear-minded to escape unscathed? I cannot speak for anyone, not even myself. You just have to risk it and see what happens. IF you dare.

Oh well. I cannot remember the last time I felt a spark. The last time probably burnt away whatever ignitable material left in me.

Life can be so awfully dull without a spark.

Until now. ^_~

Uncle Moody

I have always thought about telling you. So many times before. But the words usually fade away before they were even formed. Even on the last day, they were not said.

Because there is really no need to.

But I will always be thankful. Your presence somehow always makes everything a little better, the darkness a little brighter. It was special because it made coping with a difficult time so much easier. I have never and will never wish for more because it is not mine to hope for. Whatever I remember is just right. So there's really no need to say anything more, is there?

Besides, I think you already know.

Thank you for always being kind to me.

Rant

I am so mad at my Mum right now.

What is the matter with her? Why is she like that?

You don't take something belonging to ANYONE, much less your DAUGHTER, and GIVE IT TO SOMEONE ELSE WITHOUT ASKING FIRST.

It is not about the value of the item or what the item is or whatever shit. JUST ASK!!! JUST FREAKING ASK!!!

"Hey, do you still need this? Can I give it to someone else if you don't?"

IS THIS SO FARKING HARD TO DO? JUST A QUESTION! 1 MINUTE, 2 TOPS!

And if you have already done it, it is fine. JUST FREAKING GET IT BACK IF YOU ARE ASKED TO!!!!

I told her it is something of sentimental value because not only is it LIMITED EDITION, it is a GIFT FROM AN EX-COLLEAGUE WHO HAS LEFT THE COMPANY. HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THIS MEANS?

IT MEANS THE ITEM IS IMPORTANT!!!! IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? IMPORTANT?!!?!?!!?

So she refuses to get the item back. And when I told her that I will do it if she doesn't. I even offered to get another one in exchange. SHE SAID NO!!! WTF IS THIS? She said if I do this, she will be mad at ME. ME?!!? ME?!!?!!?!!

YOU DON'T TAKE SOMETHING FROM SOMEONE, GIVE IT TO SOMEONE ELSE, AND BE MAD WHEN SOMEONE WANTS IT BACK FROM SOMEONE ELSE, WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Arrgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

08/08/12

I am happy today.

Maybe it's the two hour massage I had. Maybe it's the public holiday tomorrow.

Doesn't matter.

It is a good week. =D

Cirque-y Talk

Watched Saltimbanco at the Indoor Stadium over the weekend, and my love for Cirque Du Soleil came back in a rush.

Mesmerising music, vibrant sets, awe-inspiring visuals, and of course the artistry of the performance. Brings me back to the days of Alegria and my artist stalking activities.

Although I will be the first to admit that I am way over the age of waiting at the crew exit of a performance to take photos with the artists, I am proud of my fandom days. People spend time and money on celebrities, but I put in the effort for Cirque Du Soleil, how cool is that? ;D

Cannot wait to catch O in Las Vegas this year. O has always fascinated me with its unique concept of being performed in water. I have been looking forward to watching it someday.

AND IT SHALL BE DONE!