Long-Winded, But Heartfelt
Trying to make up for lost time, I am trying to blog more now that I am getting my groove back. It's hard to adjust yourself when you just came back from a holiday, but I have to sometime, and now is as good a time as any. I am so lucky to have so much time to adjust. POOR SHUEN LYN STILL HAS TO GO TO LESSONS!!!
Anyway, I shall now blog about what a beautiful girl I am. Haha. For some reason, after I get to know someone for a while, they will start telling me that I am actually quite a good-looking girl. Praising my eyes, my complexion, telling me that I have a nice smile, sometimes that the whole composition of my face is nice. And then after a while, they stop praising me altogether. Why is that so? Maybe because after a while, they know that I do know that I have a nice face. I also know very well that I have fat arms and monstrous looking thighs. So I have an ugly body, but a nice face. Ahhh, He who creates us is fair, ain't he?
Well, most of them will also get acquinted with this enormous thing known as my confidence, also known as my self-centerness or my ego. I've been called names, and they are many people who says that I think I am so much cuter than I really am, yada yada. These people can come and kiss my arse, which happens to be rather gigantic too.
Despite the fact that I do like having a nice face, because sometimes, there are benefits that comes with a nice face even though everything below the neck is hideous, but having a nice face is not the most important thing to me. Everything below the neck spoils it anyway.
So why am I so confident?
Because I cannot afford to be. I really have nothing to be confident about, I am rather average in every aspects. I cannot afford to be confident, and that makes it affordable for me to be confident. Makes sense? Look at it this way, when you have nothing to lose, then why not just do it? Because I have nothing to be confident about, I have nothing to lose by being confident.
Let's say if a person is confident because she's pretty, if and when she lose her looks, she will lose that thing she can be confident about, hence she cannot afford to be confident anymore. Me, I am just confident because I have nothing to be confident about, and I cannot lose nothing, so I can be confident. And one day, if I gain everything, there's more reason to be confident, right? Ha, this is not really for people without half a brain, so take your time, alright?
It all boils down to being able to like what you are, and see parallels between your good and bad points. I like being quite an intelligent person and of course there is my nice face, my ability to be a nice person, how much I love little animals, and how easy I can be content with the simple things. And I try not to let my monstrous thighs stop me from walking faster, not to give in to my stubbornness and mean-spirited nature, and overcome all the pessimistic stuffs with all the good and wonderful things, like cute little puppy dogs and a HUGE slice of water-melon.
I am not saying that I am right all of the time, there are times when my confidence did nothing but harm to me, but that's the fun in it, right? And sometimes when I start to despise what I am, I try to move back to a stage when I liked myself better, and re-evaluate what it is that I must do to go on from there.
And also, there is really no such thing as "I don't care what other people think of me". Because almost everyone cares. People who really don't care are those in rags of clothing who are hardly scrapping by enough coins from virtual strangers to buy a decent meal. Those people really don't care. As long as you comb your hair, take a shower or wear nice clothes, you care, even a tiny little abit. People who keep saying that they don't care are liars and/or attention-seekers. Because they are saying that to impress people, and that shows that they care.
As for me, I like to think that the opinions that matters to me are those of the people who truly cares about me, and whom I care about. Because the people who truly cares about you will be the ones who looks out for you, they will respect your opinions, but also point out when you are making a mistake. These are the people who deserves to be cared about. As for the people who falls outside of this category, they can go fly lalang for all I care.
Haha, I really do think that I am so much better than I really am, don't I? Screw that, I am happy. That's all that matters.
Anyway, I shall now blog about what a beautiful girl I am. Haha. For some reason, after I get to know someone for a while, they will start telling me that I am actually quite a good-looking girl. Praising my eyes, my complexion, telling me that I have a nice smile, sometimes that the whole composition of my face is nice. And then after a while, they stop praising me altogether. Why is that so? Maybe because after a while, they know that I do know that I have a nice face. I also know very well that I have fat arms and monstrous looking thighs. So I have an ugly body, but a nice face. Ahhh, He who creates us is fair, ain't he?
Well, most of them will also get acquinted with this enormous thing known as my confidence, also known as my self-centerness or my ego. I've been called names, and they are many people who says that I think I am so much cuter than I really am, yada yada. These people can come and kiss my arse, which happens to be rather gigantic too.
Despite the fact that I do like having a nice face, because sometimes, there are benefits that comes with a nice face even though everything below the neck is hideous, but having a nice face is not the most important thing to me. Everything below the neck spoils it anyway.
So why am I so confident?
Because I cannot afford to be. I really have nothing to be confident about, I am rather average in every aspects. I cannot afford to be confident, and that makes it affordable for me to be confident. Makes sense? Look at it this way, when you have nothing to lose, then why not just do it? Because I have nothing to be confident about, I have nothing to lose by being confident.
Let's say if a person is confident because she's pretty, if and when she lose her looks, she will lose that thing she can be confident about, hence she cannot afford to be confident anymore. Me, I am just confident because I have nothing to be confident about, and I cannot lose nothing, so I can be confident. And one day, if I gain everything, there's more reason to be confident, right? Ha, this is not really for people without half a brain, so take your time, alright?
It all boils down to being able to like what you are, and see parallels between your good and bad points. I like being quite an intelligent person and of course there is my nice face, my ability to be a nice person, how much I love little animals, and how easy I can be content with the simple things. And I try not to let my monstrous thighs stop me from walking faster, not to give in to my stubbornness and mean-spirited nature, and overcome all the pessimistic stuffs with all the good and wonderful things, like cute little puppy dogs and a HUGE slice of water-melon.
I am not saying that I am right all of the time, there are times when my confidence did nothing but harm to me, but that's the fun in it, right? And sometimes when I start to despise what I am, I try to move back to a stage when I liked myself better, and re-evaluate what it is that I must do to go on from there.
And also, there is really no such thing as "I don't care what other people think of me". Because almost everyone cares. People who really don't care are those in rags of clothing who are hardly scrapping by enough coins from virtual strangers to buy a decent meal. Those people really don't care. As long as you comb your hair, take a shower or wear nice clothes, you care, even a tiny little abit. People who keep saying that they don't care are liars and/or attention-seekers. Because they are saying that to impress people, and that shows that they care.
As for me, I like to think that the opinions that matters to me are those of the people who truly cares about me, and whom I care about. Because the people who truly cares about you will be the ones who looks out for you, they will respect your opinions, but also point out when you are making a mistake. These are the people who deserves to be cared about. As for the people who falls outside of this category, they can go fly lalang for all I care.
Haha, I really do think that I am so much better than I really am, don't I? Screw that, I am happy. That's all that matters.
posted by Keiia at 4:07 AM
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